Palm Coast, FL – April 1, 2012 – According to a source with intimate knowledge of workings of the city's government, the City of Palm Coast has initiated a move to annex the Flagler County Government Administration Complex on SR100. Once the annexation is completed, the city plans to gain title through eminent domain. The plan includes a physical move of the administration building to Town Center where it will serve as Palm Coast's new city hall. Jealousy of Flagler's opulent administrative and judicial campus is thought to have sparked City Manager Jim Landon's bold strategy.
GoToby.com's source insists on anonymity because the person is not authorized to discuss the workings of city government with residents of the city.
According to Landon, the estimated $10 million cost of the move will not affect property taxes. "We will be using money that the city already has," he says.
Naturally upset with the city's apparent bullying tactics, the Flagler Board of County Commissioners tasked Commissioner George Hanns to go toe-to-toe with Landon over the issue. However, after taking one look around, Landon left the meeting thinking that Hanns was not there.
Bulldog Drive will be widened to accommodate the building's size during the move. Landon says the requirement offers the city a long awaited opportunity to enhance the gateway into Town Center. According to Landon, the Bulldog Drive upgrade will be funded with anticipated profits from the city's golf course and tennis complex.
City Councilman Bill Lewis feels that the city's plan does not go far enough. He thinks the Flagler County Airport should be annexed and titled to the city too. Lewis is miffed that he was excluded from the VIP tent at the airport's recent Wings Over Flagler air show. A News Journal article quotes Lewis as saying, "I was really surprised that Palm Coast, the big gorilla, was snubbed over the weekend at the air show. We weren’t even invited" (Actually, everyone was invited, as long as they bought a ticket.) Gorillas shouldn't have to buy tickets. Lewis wants to teach the county a lesson. He is already planning his next year's sky diving entrance to the event. The show organizer, Bill Mills, has volunteered to pack the councilman's chute?
At a recent City Council workshop, Mayor Jon Netts, suggested an amendment to the city's impact fee ordinance to include a Bureaucracy Impact Fee. The city already has school, recreation and parks, fire and rescue system, and transportation impact fees. Impact fees are assessed against builders and new businesses to cover the cost of providing added public services necessitated by additional growth. Netts argued that government also grows as new homes and businesses are built and deserves its own impact fee.
If you've read this far without becoming suspicious, I've got some great building lots in Flagler Estates (northwest corner of the county) to sell you. 168 lots were sold in the past six years for over $15,000; two for over $50,000 even though the lots are unbuildable. They're assessed for $300 each. I hope you enjoy April Fools' Day as much as I do.
Now that you're in on the joke, feel free to pass the story on to your friends.
Read past April 1st articles: